Birthday Pic

im done..

done bitchin bout the bad things that are coming my way..
how i don't have this..
why others have that..
when will this stop...
whatever did i do wrong..

i've decided to just get up, and get a move on..
nothing will happen just blabbering...

just need to deal with things i can't change..
took this pic at Max's Restaurant, Robinson's Manila..

it was my birthday.. no sleep(dark circles on the eyes have Bombay-look effect on me :D), no material presents..

just happy to have the most important gift i got this year..
still, things are not easy.. in fact, things are getting worse.. erm, more complicated..

but i still have my fingers crossed.. i know things will get better.. so long as i have her...

Birthday Blues

just as expected.. regardless of how sunny days can be during first days of August, it always rains on the 6th.. never fails! 26 years and counting... next year it won't be different.. just hope it's just the rain that won't change..

i'm not saying, birthday was bad.. after all, Dyan flew all the way from Iloilo to Manila to be with me.. and it rained, not just trickle, but down right, i'm-gonna-soak-you-wet-hard rain! woohoo!! love the rain! got the chance to stroll with Dyan under the rain.. simply nice.. very very nice...

so what's wrong? almost everything else! :D

it's just sad to think that when we don't think about serious stuff, things are all beautiful..

but when reality bites(and it's usually down to the bone hard), things start falling apart... and it sucks... sadly we can't live the dream world all the time.. when life gives us a wake up call, we sometimes wake up to a bad dream, or worse, a nightmare..

i wish i can write more positive happy thoughts.. but for now, the most i can do, is wish for better days, months and years to come...

Maybe, my tarot cards are right.. all i can, and should do for now is find a corner, curl up and cry...

- TWENTY-SIX -

It's the last hours of my RestDay last night.. and yes, I was one at home.. it's been a while since I've been grounded, not by anyone else, but lack of dough to move around with.. :D

It's been a long Dyan-less week for me.. Was watching American Choppers (FLOW bike episode with Mickey's Wheel of Blades), where Paul Sr. Paul Jr. and Mickey were doing back-up for a band for a photoshoot. It's the first time I've heard of the band and the song, so I decided to LimeWire it. Found the song's tune catchy,so I decided to check on the lyrics as well.. My, my.. This is my song!

BAD REPUTATION:

I don't give a damn 'bout my reputation
You're living in the past it's a new generation
A (man) can do what (he) wants to do and that's
What I'm gonna do
An' I don't give a damn ' bout my bad reputation

Oh no not me

An' I don't give a damn 'bout my reputation
Never said I wanted to improve my station
An' I'm only doin' good
When I'm havin' fun
An' I don't have to please no one
An' I don't give a damn
'Bout my bad reputation

Oh no, not me
Oh no, not me

I don't give a damn
'Bout my reputation
I've never been afraid of any deviation
An' I don't really care
If ya think I'm strange
I ain't gonna change
An' I'm never gonna care
'Bout my bad reputation

Oh no, not me
Oh no, not me

An' I don't give a damn
'Bout my reputation
The world's in trouble
There's no communication
An' everyone can say
What they want to say
It never gets better anyway
So why should I care
'Bout a bad reputation anyway
Oh no, not me
Oh no, not me

I don't give a damn 'bout my bad reputation
You're living in the past
It's a new generation
An' I only feel good
When I got no pain
An' that's how I'm gonna stay
An' I don't give a damn
'Bout my bad reputation

Oh no, not me
Oh no, not
Not me, not me

Hehe.. Nice one... it coincides with what I usually say.. "Tell it to someone who cares, because I don't" or "I've stopped caring a long time ago"...

hayz.. it's one of the reasons why I'm usually misunderstood by many.. it's not that I don't really care about anyone or anything... my agents/few friends can attest to that... it's just that i'm not one of those who will change just to please you.. I'm just not built that way... Not gonna kiss anyone's ass to move up in my career, nor will I smile at you, though I really want to strangle you, or hit your head with my starbucks mug, or say I'm okay, when I'm not.. Hayz... not really sure why I'm explaining myself right now.. Must be one of those birthday blues catching up on me...

Damn.. it's 2:30AM... A year older, not a bit wiser... Oh well... I'll try this year... Good start though... It's my 4th birthday here in PeopleSupport... and YES.. i'm in the office.. still... Si Gina kasi e! Nde in-approve PTO ko eh! hayz... Good start because, I still have a job.. new partner in life... and new Motto... no, i'm not gonna scrap the 2 previously mentioned ones though... just an addition..

Watched Pursuit of Happiness recently and Chris Gardner said and i quote, "If You Want Something Go Get It, Period"...

I wanted alot of things in my life.. it's just that I feel that I have not done alot to get to where i want to be, or get what i wanted..

Maybe, I'm a little bit wiser after all.. Just a little bit by knowing this.. but hey, everything starts from small things...

Happy Birthday, Carlo..