work is no more fun...

days are becoming longer these days...

i was always known as an early bird for everything... same goes for my shift... i would always be at least an hour early for work and i tend to always have a positive outlook with my job, no matter how mentally challenging it can become...

that was then. i really don't know if it's just me or is it caused by many circumstances that i have been through lately or it is just the summer heat. i really don't know.

just the thought of going back to work is beginning to be a challenge. is it because of the work load that has been lain over our backs to heave, us being elnk's universal agents? is it because of the fact that people i have worked with though the past years have left or has very nearly planned resignations? or is it because of the new celphone-less, browsing-deprived, network restricted ops floor policies that have just been laid out? is it the fact that i have been working on this account with no growth at all? am i already tired of the work i'm doing? is it the negative vibes that has been looming all over our ops floor? is it just because if my latest QA score where i just got a highlight on the scale?(damn my QA! damn her for being OC!)

or is it my personal life affecting my job? i haven't settled my personal bouts yet... i have been bearing a lot of problems from back home. i haven't been mentally at peace with my love life situation. i dont want to give up on my Ex. pathetic as it may soound, i still not over it yet. many times i have been tempted to move on and find a new one (it wasn't as hard as i thought it maybe!); but there is something in me that somehow still feels for cindy. i don't know. is it also because of our impending high school reunion wherein i'm not that confident to face my classmates yet? i don't know.

i really don't know much lately...
but one thing i know is that i'm not thrilled to work here anymore...
i'm tired...

if someone can shed light on these feel free to keep it to yourself... :P
kidding...

i just wanna lie down, lick my paws and clean myself to sleep. i don't wanna think anymore.
i'm just tired...