it's friday again... finally...

the best part of the week has finally arrived...

it had been a very long week for me... because of our shift rotation at PS, i had to bear with only one rest day last workweek, and an eleven by four shift is hard to bear without it's 3 day restday perk. the best thing about a tiring week, is it's end... the weekend.

i can see it now... 72 call-less and worry-free hours, not to mention it's a payday weekend!

ah...

bliss...
countdown begins...

11 hours 18 minutes and counting...

and it's Monday again...

today is the first day, at least for me, after the shift rotation was implemented here in Elnk.

Rotation equates to new supes, new seat plans, and new computer stations. lucky for me my schedule didn't change so circadian rhythm would still be in sync. also my supe is also a good one; known for his sturdy and heavyset built, and also for being one of the few team heads who really look after his direct reports. what bugs me most is the fact that i have to set-up my station again; from my softwares to the feng shui-ish arrangement of my coffee mug, to my rayban, to my CMS, to my one ear-phoned headset, to my pile of junk papers that i can't find the courage to throw away, i dunno why, but i just can't.

i went two hours early in the office just to do this ritual. one and half hours later; everything "seems" to be settled.

i should be good to go for the night.
i was running through my lucheon meat in OutLook, and i came across the DR list for this period.

then it hit me.

i dunno anyone in my new team. i was always a lone soldier in the 5pm shift. now i have new teammates. not that there is anything wrong with that but it just came to me that i won't be sitting Nokia2100 who is my lunch buddy; Lifesuck won't be there to bug us with his very corny jokes; wally won't be there to back me up when we are trippin with lifesuck, and the rest of the gang won't be there to laugh at him! :)

i am sure to miss those guys. i admit they were the most fun group i had been with in PS.

i sure hope lifesuck remembers to take his autism-suppressant pills...

oxymoron version 2.0

it's going to be a long day.

Yesterday after being persuaded by Pau, i agreed to join him in applying for passport this morning in Pasig. City Hall decided to host DFA's express passporting campaigns, and we thought it would be best to take advantage of it, since it's just one ride away from home. I thought to myself, what the hell, payday is just a week from now, and i thought, i would still have enough dough to last me till then. So i said fine. let's go for it.

we decided to get our NBI clearances together with sensui at megamall. I had work thursday night, when i got off from work at around 4am. Pau, with equal persistency as sensui, insisted that i meet them 10am. "dame pila dun, agahan naten!", pau said in defense with his great idea... so, stupid i, followed. with only 4 hours of sleep, i got up and hauled my ass to megamall.

as predictable as the sun will rise tomorrrow, he was late. considering he had no shift that night, he was late. argh!!! 11am, he came with his stupid lookin smirk on his face. "sorry, trapik eh...", the slowpoke said.

oh well, after snagging the clearances, and draining our energy in an attempt to cover every square foot of megangmall. we decided to crash in sensui's condo. and there was silence...
after munchin on our fave bbq, cold rice and coke diet, it was already 9pm. i was scheduled to do OTRD tonight so i went to JG,and went ahead to do 5 hours of slavery. again, with 4 hours of sleep, i found myself at Pasig Sports Complex.

again, i was persuaded to come early. "mahaba ang pila, pakshit", paulito text'd. but when i got there, only a handful of people were in line. hay...

2 hours on all is well and done. bad trip, sagwa ng picture ko! hay... life...
as karma to his inconsiderate persuasion to compel people to go somewhere earlier than needed, he was not able to push through with his passport application. Mali spelling kase pangalan...

tsk tsk tsk...pangalan lang nagkamali pa... tsk tsk tsk...

it's 2 pm. 3 hours and im on hot seat again... with only 4 hours of sleep packed, 60bucks to last me until next friday, and my atm sitting in pampanga... all i can do is find a corner, brood, and cry...

good luck to my calls...
;'(

Moments...

it's a amazing how a simple touch can relieve one person forget everyone and everything around him.

it's unbelievable how one moment, even just a few minutes can be so life defining.

it's really remarkable how time can be made special; so special in a way that anyone will be willing to trade everything he has, loan everything he still has to acquire, and sometimes even offer his life for that one special moment.

it's incredible how one person can touch another person's life; and make him a brand new man.

it's really wonderful how a very bad day can take a 180 degree turn in a blink of an eye.

just amazing... simply amazing...

im proud to have been chosen to be given those very rare moments today...

the case of the missing taho vendor...

i really feel proud of myself this morning. i have managed to keep my temper at a low during the most part of my shift. it took a lot of will power and sheer determination not to hurt my pc last night. i decided to reward myself with my favorite morning craving...

as soon as my shift ended i took a trip down RS, and got out to scout and hunt manong, the taho vendor.

it was 4:10AM, a handful of call center agents were parked outside breathing their lungs to death; some slumped on the sides of the RS building with their girl/boyfriends lying on their laps, possibly just enjoying the early morning air, trying to forget the fact that another saturday night had been missed. others just getting breaths of fresh air.

still manong is nowhere in sight.

dawn-shift peeps were rushing out of their cabs; scurrying and scampering to the elevators, RS guards were brushing morning glories left and right, and my colleagues with same end shift as mine were zombie-like dragging their tired asses out of the halls of RS; half awake - half asleep, they marched out, following the long calls of their comfy beds back home

manong taho is still nowehere in sight.

i went to the back of RS hoping manong taho would be there. i see the usual tikbalang like creatures of the night across the road, silhouettes enveloped by puffs of smoke... still no manong taho in sight.

darn! where the hell is he? is it too early? Nah! i think not! went out there earlier in than 4am before, and he would be there; he was always there... i tried to go near the PB com building, across the street and near insular bank alleys... i tried to go to the back of hsbc upto the starbucks area to no avail...

i gave up. it's 5AM already. im hungry. i need food...

i decided to just go to jollibeer across the street and settled for relatively satisfying burger steak breakfast meal.

but even as i sip on my hot choco and played with my gravy and egg, i still wondered about manong taho, and where had gone to... was he too sick to work today? had he been victim to an accident, or had he been heldup, or was he arrested for selling taho at Ayala? was he killed?

i shook my head; i'm beginning to become morbid again, for all we know, manong taho was out partying all night, got laid and got too much alcohol that he can digest that he drowned himself to sleep, and is still swimming up in neverland; maybe he had gone tired of taho vending and has declared a self-proclaimed day-off...after all, he is the master of his own business. he is his own boss.

oh well...

life goes on...

Saturday Night Work...

ox·y·mo·ron (ŏk'sē-môr'ŏn', -mōr'-) n., pl. -mo·ra (-môr'ə, -mōr'ə) or -rons.

- A rhetorical figure in which incongruous or contradictory terms are combined.

tonight is my first time to do saturday night work.

i'm forced to do this because of the such-short-notice shift changes made by management last week. im forced to do it. i like PS. i'm just not a fan of changes.

i got my mom a ride to pampanga after doing groceries at Robinson's. then i dragged myself to work and came in to our stuffy-smelling room, with only a handful of agents on the floor; same poor souls entasked to do work on a saturday night.

i brought a couple of C2's and a family-size bag of clover chips with me just to inspire me to work. sadly the chips only lasted 45 minutes, and my c2 dropped it's last 20 minutes later.
no browse policy is still in effect, so i can only do so much on the computer. i'm typing this blog on a lime green sticky notepad.

i have failed three of my last four QA sessions last week. all because of my temper. i told myself, today, screw AHT. im on QA mode. i must do good tonight.

while waiting for calls. i busied myself meditating;conditioning myself not to be irate tonight. after all, it's just one night. i just hope nobody will give me attitude tonight...

or else, they're gonna get it from me...

i miss G3...
i miss my starbucks...
i miss my saturday night already...

:'(

abused...

for the past the few days, clouds of unrest still loom over the Elnk floor. no browse - no handhelds - no fun policy is still in effect; more and more drafted resignation letters are being moved to the outbox, more and more seats are being vacant, and staffing is getting worse. team stats are plummeting and agents' patience are getting more and more mice are slammed, keyboards harmed, monitors whacked...

i personally feel really sad about what Elnk has become. it used to be a fun place.
i used to love my job. now, every minute seems to be a struggle.

i really feel bad for my pc at work. it used to be a well kept and organized, and scratchless. now, it's really badly beaten, enveloped by dust and very worn out. my scroll ball is already badly bruised; all the dust and speckles on my station had been crusted to it's surface, hence it won't work 60% of the time. my monitor is my punching bag at work. each and every time a caller is giving me attitude, my monitor takes the blows. no wonder my monitor desktop, only displays 256 colors...

poor computer...

poor computers...

the only things equally abused on the ops floor compared to the hamsters and test mice in front
them are the computers... agents are helpless in venting out their frustrations caused by stupid callers, and the only resort available to them is to take it out on their helpless computers. but in my whole stay in PS, i have yet to see a PC killed in action; though badly brusied, they continue to do their jobs each and everyday.

if i were to buy a pc, though it may take long... i would surely invest on an HP. tried, beaten, abused, and tested; built to last...

En Taro Adun!

i woke up 2AM this morning and i have all i could think of is the playing starcraft.

it had been such a long time since i played starcraft, particularly the broodwars episode; it was five years already if i'm not mistaken. the moment i saw kerrigan's protrait, memories of college years came rushing in.

i had two many sleepless nights, too many cracked piggy banks, and too much electricity spent on that darn addictive game. memories of college buddies also came to play; noel and his 12 dark templar surprise attack, to mark's terran marine, firebat goliath shuffle to andrew's carrier splurge. My personal fave was the Zerg race; just loved them ultralisks! i loved keeping a very low profile, defensive in stance and just mining all the resources available until i can muster enough minerals and gas to command an armada of level3 ultralisks, and fleets of guardians, and countless zerglings to raze all standing infrastructures that can come my way.

i was good then.

after 2 hours of game play, i had my groove back. i was tearing down bases after bases, zooming from mission to another. i had the most enjoyable 8 hours of my life. it was sheer bliss.

then, as dependable as the sun rising tomorrow or waking up with my cat beside me occupying the 3/4 of my bed, or an irate elnk eRep growling on the ops floor, reality bites...
it's 10AM! i have a 5PM shift tonight! I have to get out of Pampanga before 12NN, and get my ass on a bus to Manila!

"La na naman akong tulog!"

Oh well, what's new...

at least i had fun...

some good things never last...

I have less than 24 hours left of my 4 day long weekend/rest day vacation, and yet my body still craves for more. one of the management heads, who i call mulagat (yep, im very well known to give nicknames to people, because of the 24/7 mulagat look), decided to change my rest days from a straight 3 day weekend, which i very well deserve to have because of very good SA stats, into a friday, sunday, monday off! ARGH!

5 seconds after she hit the send button on Outlook, i went to her station and confronted her, and she, said with a very jolly Manang Bola-ish tone, "wag ka malulungkot, hiwalay na rest day mo, wag malulungkot..." if only heaven gave me enough strength, i would have hit her with an avaya cms phone right on her head...

but it was late... it was 9AM already and being up for the past 17 hours, i can't afford to waste energy on her. i just walked away. i thought to myself, i have a four day interim period to enjoy...
time really heals. four days later, i accepted my fate. i work in a call center doomed to become a flexible slave. a slave without a right to complain....

...out-loud, that is.

the purpose of the "delete message" button...

i came in early for work today because of two things; one to see bourgeoisie, and number two try out if the card reader can work behind the restrictions set in the computers. first one was satisfied early on my shift, for she was the first one i saw upon entering the stuffy office of the 33rd floor. she was very casually dressed and in her black sleeveless and body-fit tops, and a very cool looking 3/4 capri pants... "Nice start.", i said to myself.

she was not so bourgeoisie-ey this afternoon. she was just happily lickin on her favorite snack, ice cream, which she usually drops, or manages to make a mess out it, and still proudly announces it.

second objective failed, though. card reader can be connected but downloads still don't work. oh well. at least i can still copy paste and upload images files to the net. i uploaded high school friend's pic son our yahoo groups. i'm happy.

then for some bad wind of air, i decided to open my gmail account; dedicated to cindy and our past. i was running through our past emails, looking for some good email to forward to my officemates when i came across an email that she had sent me around October time.

"LA LANG" was title and body read(all in caps); "HIERS!LA LANG HOPE U LIKE IT! LOVE YAH! MWAH! -DY"

and attached to it was a 2MB non-compressed picture of her, cris and 2 guy officemates.

the bad thing about Gmail is the set-up that you see what you replied to the original message.

"at sino na naman yung dalawang kumag sa likod? hmm...", i replied back.

and then it hit me... it was my fault... not completely, but a big chunk of the main reason why our relationship failed was because of me.

i literally cried when i saw it... i was a jerk...

Darn that Gmail! Why the hell does it not have a simple delete button! Why does it need to have a move to trash option, when a simple delete button would have done the job! and I wouldn't, and shouldn't be suffering right now!

i should've deleted that stupid email.

I miss my girl...

Darn that delete button!

"Anything less than love is a waste of my time"

my friend from work, trixie... an eRep famous for her Bb. Pilipnas version of an Elnk call greeting, posted a friendster bulletin with the same title as today's blog...

she was discussing 2 quotes from the film; Dream for an Insomniac; a Jennifer Aniston flick, which i had an opportunity to watch 2 months ago, when i was still brooding over my heartaches.

the 2 quotes were "I don't want to be sixty years old and married to my second best choice, wondering what ever happened to the one who got away..." and "Anything less than love is a waste of my time. There are so many mediocre things in life, and love shouldn't be one of them."

i agree, i totally agree.

after watching the movie, it made my heartache worse. this movie is the man reason why i found it hard to let go of the Cindy. always, at the back of my mind, what if she really was the one, and i just didn't try hard enough, or i just gave up too soon. it's really disturbing to think about the possibility of us ending up with the wrong person... after all the planning from teenhood to all the courting and daydreaming of being with the person we would like to grow old with... someone to share our gray years... it's really hard to think of such a thought.

but then again, it there really such a perfect, specially chosen person for each and every person? or is it just a matter or chancing upon each other as we age? i know people who are madly in-love with each other even 40 years after marriage; who claimed to have had past lovers thinking they were soul mates and ended parting ways because of irreconcilable differences...

"simple lang buhay kase, pinapapacomplika pa eh...", Paulito always says...

very well said...

and women expect men to be faithful...

i have this officemate from work, who i call 2100. 2100 is a person reknowned for her abusive use of phone before shift; the day would never be complete without her calling her boo. she speaks highly of him, and praises him to be faithful, and would never dare cheat on her. she considers her long enough relationship to be rock steady. she is proud to say that she would already want to settle with the guy.

promising relationship, one can say.

then she came to work yesterday, with her hair did, and at least 2 hours early for work. she turned in her phone to the guard on duty. and she was all excited.

"what's up with 2100?", i thought to myself. she was just all wide-eyed and uneasy in her seat...

then at lunch, i learned she was all that because she was waiting on her crush... she was so disappointed to learn that he was absent for the day, and all her exerted efforts were in vain.

i jokingly asked her, "alam ba yan boypren mo? ine-expect mo cia na magaing faithful sa yo tapos ikaw me pacrush-crush pa!". she defensively replied, "oo, noh! alam nia" i didn't believe her. i think no one in the room believed her :) "baket ba? crush lang naman ah! Ala yun! Normal yun!"

yeah right...

while chomping on our lunch ng bayan, binalot, i drifted away thinking about the logic behind crushes... it got me nowhere...

sure there are many beautiful women, and men around. to those who will disagree, they are either blind, autistic, or haven't been to Ayala or G3 at least. young, fresh and yummy yuppies.
some defend their stand on having a crush by sayin "Iba naman yung crush sa love ah!"

sure, i see where they are coming from. but ask 'em this, if their guy/gal of their fantasies are to be mutually attracted to them, and would respond to their signals, or for the guys, make their moves on you... will they give in? many would say no immediately. i say, "yeah right"

Yeah right...
and they expect men to be faithful...

reminiscing high school...

many say high school life is the best...
i say, "it was..."

last saturday, a group of my high school friends organized a high school section 1 class reunion. honestly i had second thoughts of going there. modesty and humility aside i was very good back in high school. i was in section one from pre-school to high school; finishing top of the class, each and every year till high school, when my priorities changed. finished 3rd best in my graduating class; recepient of many special awards and recognitions, with flat 100% average grade in Accounting, and a Best in Values Education recognition... yep, i know what you're thinking... i, too, don't know where that came from... all these i got without much effort in studying. otherwise i would've finished first! ;P

and our school was not just an low quality and substandard school. at least not back then...

people had very high expectations from me. a straight A student; with countless academic awards under his belt, and a ticket to UP Diliman's holy grounds for college, to pursue a quota course from a much highly regarded Engineering Course...

then life happened... and it almost crippled me...

but i have never cared for what people say and what their opinions are about me. so i went. also, my highschool crush, and textmate will be there, taguro3.

i was really glad i came. many of my high school buds were there, especially taguro3 who was the frist to greet me. it was exactly 7 years when we last saw each other. it was a really good thing to see them again. see her again. many were time capsuled and never changed a bit while some got out of their old shells and got into other people's bodies..

old secrets were shared; from crushes, (of course, i never revealed mine, i'm no sucker...) to old grudges to Jayronn's old supernatural friends. "yung mga makina, meron ding mga buhay yan, kaya kinakausap ko sila para gumana...", jayronn remarked while explaining what exactly he does at trendmicro. from someone who has elves and supernatural sprits as friends back in high school, he has gone a long way. at least machines are tangible... still he brings his ever reliable umbrealla. (at least two fold na, nde na yung semi golf umbrella he religiously brings even on 37 degree Celsius summer days... "baka daw umulan...")

of course, lovelives were discussed; from my Cindy's astronaut and space exploration adventures, to other's attached and everblooming committed lives to other's "single and going strong" celibasy.

many did well in college and managed to be score high-paying but still pencil pusher job. alot benefit from callcenter boom and became instant vamps, while others still pursue college diplomas...

im so glad i came. after crisanta towers, we went to metrowalk to caffeine-ize the night. then after talking for hours, taguro3 and the rest of the girls decided to go to malate. then after malate, tagaytay...

everybody treated the event as if tomorrow is never to come.

everybody had no energy left. it was 9am.
i only have energy to finish this blog. started this on my phone, just barely sync'd it to my pc.

i loved high school. all it's simplicity and carefree-ness. i loved my friends back in high school. wish i could bring back the days... and free myself from love life heart attacks, money woes, work "suckage", and most of all free myself from sleepless nights because life's uncertainties, and burden of being the one to shoulder my family and heave life's trials that are to dawn upon me...

it was a perfect night...

McDo is queuing again...

mcdo is queuing again...

it was 1:15 am. my lunch buddie and i was sauntering along the back of Paseo on our way to McDo. I'm craving for Chicken McDo tonight. Seventh floor food no longer give me any perks during lunch breaks, so we waste 10 minutes just to treat ourselves to 24 hour golden arches'. the week before salary day, only a handful of nocturnal ayala vamps sojourn mangdo. the crew are all easy going, and fried chicken parts are all available, and best of all no lines to fall into.

this morning, it's different. when we got there, at least 20 people were in line, 70% or the badly lit food area was taken, and the service crew who usually waves to greet you, were in chaos!

"kaswsweldo lang kase...", murmurred abbie."halatang halata talaga pag baging sweldo!", she added. She's right. many are getting 2piece chickens, and mcnuggets with go-large fries and coke, with mcflurries on the side. money is no object tonight.
it's really nice to see young peeps like us being given a chance to earn more than the basic pinoy workforce salary, and being able to spend it the way they like it. being able to treat themselves to good food til they become peasants again until the next payday.
"ubos ubos biyaya..." abi, said while munching on her nuggets...

""oo nga... inubos nila chicken...", i said while i quietly and disappointedly gnawed on my burger...

i wanted chicken....

:'(